Perhaps I am alone in this, probably not. But often I find myself sitting on the pity-pot. The pity-pot is that place where we allow all our insecurities, inadequacies, and frustrations to take control of our thoughts.

 

The pity-pot is that place where we fall into the demonic trap of comparison. I am using the word demonic deliberately because comparisons always steal our joy and leave us feeling “less than.” Intellectually, I understand the trap of comparisons. Theologically, I understand that the image of God creates a person of value, even when I choose to reject that image and choose instead to wallow in my own sense of worthlessness. Spiritually, I understand that God has plan and purpose for my life. I am where God has placed me with the gifts, skills, and talents that God wants me to have. Still, I am human. And I continue to fall into the trap of self-deprecation, comparison, negative self-talk, all of which pulls me further away from the heart and purpose of God. That is why comparison is demonic.

 

Comparison inevitably leads to jealousy. Jealousy strains friendships, sometimes to the breaking point. My friend makes more money, bought a new car, got the job I wanted. On the surface I express my support and encouragement for her success. In my mind, “why not me” threatens the relationship.

 

“Why not me” devolves into, there must be something wrong with me. I must not be good enough, or talented enough. It isn’t a big leap from those thoughts to thoughts of resentment. Rather than celebrating my friend’s success I allow my resentment to take root, and a healthy relationship can suffer irreparable harm.

 

Worse. God’s image and my personhood, is diminished by my comparisons, jealousy, and self-loathing.

 

It is far easier to fall into the pity-pot than to climb out of it. However, the self-talk that pushes one into disillusionment can be redirected to enable us to climb out of discouragement and disappointment.

 

It is important to remind yourself that you are created in God’s image and likeness. (Genesis 1:27). The New Interpreter’s Study Bible describes “image of God” this way: the image of God describes humanity’s preeminent position in the world and humanity’s responsibility to rule in creation as God’s representative. Human beings are thus mediators, of God’s presence in the world.

 

If we are God’s representatives we cannot be “less than.” To constantly tell ourselves how worthless and valueless we are demeans the image of God. Change the language. “I am created in God’s image. I have value and worth.” It is not arrogant or self-aggrandizing. It is true and we need to claim that position for ourselves.

 

You are precisely where God wants you to be. Your gifts, talents, abilities, strengths, and skills are being used just as God intends. You have been placed where you are to fulfill God’s purpose in the circumstances in which you find yourself. We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28) Understand this. When God calls you, you are called to God’s purpose where you are.

 

Climbing out of the pit of self-deprecation, disillusionment and discouragement is not easy. There will be many times when comparisons and jealousies threaten to overwhelm our sense of self-worth. Refocusing the demonic self-talk into positive self-talk affirming the image of God in which you are created enables you to see yourself as the beloved child of God.

 

In complete honesty, writing these words is a lot easier than living them. My self-talk is more often negative than positive. It is much easier to damn than to affirm. It is a spiritual discipline to learn to appreciate oneself and live into the Creator’s intentions for our lives. Like all disciplines it takes continuous attention, nurture, and practice. Here’s a thought. Be gentle with yourself. You won’t get it right every time. Give yourself grace.

 

You are God’s beloved child.